Overwhelming Urges!

It has been 12 weeks now since my injury really flared up in the Lakes and I haven't run since. 

However, on Sunday I was walking Ruby up to Two Lads and, on the way down, heading towards the water tanks, the urge to run overwhelmed me.  I love running downhill and, as I had Ruby off the lead, I decided to have a bit of a trot. 

It felt amazing! 

I really enjoyed myself but this came to an end for two reasons:

1.  I wasn't in running clothes and therefore not wearing a sports bra.  I really don't understand how women, especially women more endowed than me, can run without a sports bra.  It's awful and makes your boobs ache, or is that just me?

2.  I came across some sheep and so had to quickly get Ruby back on the lead and there was no way I was going to carry on running with her dragging on the bungee lead to get to the sheep.   

So the run didn't really last long, probably quarter of a mile at most.

My feet felt fine whilst running but, again, the throb was back afterwards.  I really can't put this injury into words, it's too difficult to describe.  The fact that there is very little pain now is frustrating because I feel like I can run but I'm still aware that there is a problem. My feet just don't feel right and will throb and 'clunk' from time to time.  I also have no feeling in my second toe of my right foot (this isn't the foot which was initially injured) and can stick a pin in it without feeling it. 

This morning I took Ruby on our short walk which is just a loop from home around the stables up the hill. It's about a mile and a half and I did have a little bit of a jog on and off throught this.  Again, it felt great but, again, I was still aware that something wasn't right.

Part of me thinks 'screw it, just go out and run' but the other part of me things 'am I going to end up making things even worse and causing more damage?'.

On speaking to a different physio socially, she said that she has come across MTP synovitis before and that, whilst it can sometimes be treated with physio, quite often a referral needs to be made to an orthopaedic surgeon who will do injections, which is something I have read about on the internet.  I'm just really frightened of going down that route because when I discussed this with another runner, he informed me that his other half had had injections into her foot and this had destroyed her fat pad, which has obviously hindered her running ever since.

Very frustrating.